Tomorrow and today
I've not been blogging much. Maybe it's just because I've lost the interest. I don't know, I'll just keep doing this for a while, see how I feel in a couple of months time.
Cause I've been blogging for close to 3 years now, and I can't just stop blogging like that. I did take a hiatus, back about a year plus. I was convinced I'd stop blogging for good, but I came back in like 2 months time? Haha...
It's been weird recently. I can't say it was the best of times, but it was certainly a period of time where I had to learn to be strong. It seems weird that after being 'assured, receptive blah blah blah see above tagline' for close to 20 years I find myself really lost for a while. It kind of threw me off for a while. It's like standing outside my body looking at myself as I struggle to come to terms. I did not recognise who I was, and that made me frustrated. Never really occured to me that my moods could be so affected by someone other than me. It made me scared too. And it really haven't occured to me that I am really not much different from other girls as well. Meaning I thought I could handle things very well on my own, but seriously I'm just a wreck.
Anyway! See I've been getting on so well about writing serious stuff BUT have to go supper now. Lala... see if got mood to talk about it later.
Oh ya! I cut my hand! And now there's a pretty pink Disney princesses plaster covering it!
Whee.
Edit
It sounded like I purposely went to cut my hand to wear a princess plaster... erm, I did not. Haha.
Anyway, back to topic. It took my mind a while to wrap the idea around my head. That it's no more. Over. I'm kind of slow to come to terms with things. Just not facing up to things. But I got my wake up call yesterday, catharsis and all, what with all the crying and harsh words.(I really like the word catharsis!) Yes, I got it, I understand.
Now too tired to do anything, perhaps it's better also, just wait till I am too tired to think also. Maybe it's just the Piscean psyche? We tend to wallow... till the deepest depths. Then once we've fully experienced this emotion, we pick ourselves up and move on. It's very Tuesdays With Morrie - when Morrie said we have to let the emotion fully penetrate us, before we can understand what that emotion is about, and then we can start to detach and move on without regrets and fear. Playing each sad scenario in my mind over and over again until one day I'm able to think about it and not feel sad. (This has psychological basis! Haha... Caleb said so) I'm sorry, it's just not me to just forget everything immediately and move on. I tried to on Friday, but I just couldn't yet. Maybe it's a process I have to go through.
Enough of this. It's boring.
Supper was good! =D
I have a test on Friday! Ugh.
Edit
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
No.
Cause I've been blogging for close to 3 years now, and I can't just stop blogging like that. I did take a hiatus, back about a year plus. I was convinced I'd stop blogging for good, but I came back in like 2 months time? Haha...
It's been weird recently. I can't say it was the best of times, but it was certainly a period of time where I had to learn to be strong. It seems weird that after being 'assured, receptive blah blah blah see above tagline' for close to 20 years I find myself really lost for a while. It kind of threw me off for a while. It's like standing outside my body looking at myself as I struggle to come to terms. I did not recognise who I was, and that made me frustrated. Never really occured to me that my moods could be so affected by someone other than me. It made me scared too. And it really haven't occured to me that I am really not much different from other girls as well. Meaning I thought I could handle things very well on my own, but seriously I'm just a wreck.
Anyway! See I've been getting on so well about writing serious stuff BUT have to go supper now. Lala... see if got mood to talk about it later.
Oh ya! I cut my hand! And now there's a pretty pink Disney princesses plaster covering it!
Whee.
Edit
It sounded like I purposely went to cut my hand to wear a princess plaster... erm, I did not. Haha.
Anyway, back to topic. It took my mind a while to wrap the idea around my head. That it's no more. Over. I'm kind of slow to come to terms with things. Just not facing up to things. But I got my wake up call yesterday, catharsis and all, what with all the crying and harsh words.(I really like the word catharsis!) Yes, I got it, I understand.
Now too tired to do anything, perhaps it's better also, just wait till I am too tired to think also. Maybe it's just the Piscean psyche? We tend to wallow... till the deepest depths. Then once we've fully experienced this emotion, we pick ourselves up and move on. It's very Tuesdays With Morrie - when Morrie said we have to let the emotion fully penetrate us, before we can understand what that emotion is about, and then we can start to detach and move on without regrets and fear. Playing each sad scenario in my mind over and over again until one day I'm able to think about it and not feel sad. (This has psychological basis! Haha... Caleb said so) I'm sorry, it's just not me to just forget everything immediately and move on. I tried to on Friday, but I just couldn't yet. Maybe it's a process I have to go through.
Enough of this. It's boring.
Supper was good! =D
I have a test on Friday! Ugh.
Edit
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
No.
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